it's nice to be treated like a human being even while having
your brains fucked out.
just my thought for the evening after taking in the scene at the
bar where i now go for karaoke. it amazes me that i now live in
a society where i can hear the "show me your pussy" song just by
going out for a drink or to sing. on one hand, i enjoy the liberation.
on the other hand, congratulations -- we've now reduced both men
and women to their genitalia. we are viagra. we are astroglide.
we are nothing more than fleshy slip-n-slides.
the touchiness in these situations gets to me too. i think there's
still part of my brain that is that boy in 9th grade, afraid to even
put his arm around his girlfriend or hold her hand. i don't know
what my deal was with physical contact back then, but every so often,
in situations like you get in a bar, i feel those defenses jump in
a bit. yes, you're talking to me. why is your hand resting on my
arm? oh, that's right... the fleshy slip-n-slide thing. you're
trying to precursor that. but, um, this is the first sentence you've
ever said to me, and you're touching me? it doesn't always happen,
but i still feel that jump in every once in a while.
all very strange. am i looking for civility, even among something
as primal as the mating/dating scene? that might be it. i get the
feeling it's evaporated away, for the most part. alcohol has a lower
boiling point than any bodily fluid, so why shouldn't it have evaporated?
everyone awash, even drowning, in whatever the bartenders will help
them get their hands on, and what are they really trying to wash away?
i mean, how many inhibitions are left at this point anyway? i suppose
no one is getting naked on the dance floor. maybe that's one. lots
of implied sex, but no real heat no real meeting of meat. our society
is so fucking odd (pardon the pun). and what if the mores that kept
this from happening in public evaporated like so many usual conventions
do in an ethanol stew? do we see large scale predation? who would be
the predators? who would be the prey? and would i just sit on my
barstool and watch and make all these mental notes like the ones
that i'm now spilling into this file?
and the barriers have their levels, don't they? how often do drunken
strangers touch while talking? rub against each other while dancing?
lock lips, though they've spoken few words to each other? how often do
the "i never even got his/her name" hook-ups occur? does any of this qualify
as communication if the parties themselves don't know what they're saying?
yeah, i know. i should probably just get myself more to drink. "you miss
too much these days if you stop to think..." if you have any suggestions
for things to wash all of this out of my head with next time i'm in a
situation like this,
please let me know. suggestions of things such as drano or strychnine
will be summarily ignored.
